Although I’m not a fan of the label “Divorce Recovery Workshop,” the concession above is made in deference to the Higher Calling that I believe this work serves.
To wit: Helping people do the best they can when faced with marital crisis.
When I lost the mother of our son to divorce in the year 2000, I went through a divorce recovery workshop hosted by a Presbyterian Church near my home. As I grew close to an associate pastor there, we came to have increasingly detailed dialogues about the appropriate Scriptural propriety of such a program under that roof.
Malachi 2:16 is frequently cited as point of contention. “‘For I hate divorce,’ says the Lord of Hosts” [NASB]. Later, Jesus Christ was tested by Pharisees on the issue of divorce, as recorded by Apostle Matthew in his chapter 19 of his Gospel.
That pastor (then my pastor) — who had been raised Catholic, by the way, and had no concern about his parents remaining so in terms of their eternal salvation — said that he viewed Our Lord in this regard akin to an ER doctor.
Jesus did not encourage automobile crashes, advancing infections, or surgical errors. Rather, He came when called upon, to offer care and healing that began with approaching patients where they were, as they were.
The following year, I volunteered as a mentee under several professional, disparately-gifted divorce recovery workshop leaders. From that foundation, I created a weekly walk-in divorce support group that ran three years under a specified Protestant structure, followed by another eight with a broader Christian reach that I personally subsidized on my own.
My first independent foray onto the Internet was a free-access website developed to serve as a local clearinghouse of educational resources on any and all aspects of the struggle. Local begot State of Michigan, begot national, begot (to a limited degree) global. Here’s the last, most refined layout of those efforts.
In 2024, I completely overhauled that site and undertook to re-capture as much as I could from past efforts and consolidate them on their own Page under Divorce Balance. The lion’s share of this is roughly hosted under the WayBack Machine architecture — but, I believe, worth the extra effort that entails to make use of today.
It’s surely been important enough for me to consolidate in whatever it can mean as support for those who continue to enter divorce courts today, tomorrow, and beyond.
On this, my personal home site, too, I’ve swallowed-hard to set aside my avoidance (phobia?) of taxonomies viz tagging to gather content here that portends value outside of the main. I believe that it shows my commitment to this Calling has never-ended.
And I wouldn’t be surprised if some readers believe that it gives them insights into how I approach divorce societally, unfiltered.
— Dell Deaton
December 5, 2021
rev January 6, 2026; June 10, 2025; April 16, 2025; December 5, 2021; January 29, 2017